How’s your 4th of July going? Me, I’m celebrating by taking it easy….still in pj’s. During the month of June I bought a house, changed carpet in the 3 bedrooms, remodeled a bathroom, painted, and did a business trip to LA and a fun trip to NYC. Over 3 days in the Big Apple I visited Southside Seaport, the site of the Twin Towers, the Guggenheim, the Metropolitan, Chinatown, Tiffany’s, Chanel, Grand Central Station, and more. It’s been fun and crazy. I know your life is similar….a lot of good things going on. At times it feels like too much of a good thing.
Today is a good day to think about what it means to be independent.
In some ways, we can be independent and in other ways, it’s better to go for interdependent. (Something I learned from my time working with the Stephen Covey group in Caracas years ago.) In essence, I think interdependence is the realization that we are all interconnected and that all our decisions affect many other people.
The thing is, we are independent in the sense that we make decisions, and then accept (or not) the consequences of those decisions. Two important points here: 1) Our lives are largely the product of our decisions, and 2) Not making a decision is itself making a decision.
Here’s an example I bet you can relate to: getting your hair highlighted.
I got my hair cut right before heading to NYC and my hairdresser asked me if I wanted to update my highlights. (I had just had a very few highlights done near the end of April.)
My response was, I don’t want to be a slave to my highlights.
Probably not everyone would get that but I think you do. Once you decide to color your hair, you have to keep doing it, or live with roots of a different color.
Getting highlights is fun (well, fun after it’s done) and usually they look fantastic. For about 6 weeks. Maybe 8.
So, getting your hair colored is a decision that brings on other decisions….whether to continue and how often and which color. You have to consider the price you want to pay and the time you’re willing to invest.
You are totally free to choose. But once you choose, there are consequences.
Maybe that’s why most of us hate making decisions. It’s like we want our cake and to eat it, too. Plus we’re terrified of making the wrong decision. (Hint: it always works out, better make the decision and move forward.)
Now that I’ve made a colossal case out of something so mundane as hair color, I’ll leave you with this to think about when you’re feeling not free — stuck in a whirlwind of never ending activities and commitments.
To be independent, truly, you have to claim it. No one can bestow independence on you. The part of your life that feels overwheming can change. Once you make that decision.
Happy 4th and may you relish and enjoy your many blessings.