Were you born under a lucky star? Or do you even remember? Have you noticed how some people seem to have teflon coating for the troubles of this life? How some people seem be naturally glamorous, or super successful or accomplished? And then there’s you….and me.
People often ask me about what the heck is coaching, life coaching or executive coaching and I totally understand because I never really heard of it myself until 2008. I was in a bad spot – recently divorced and feeling not exactly lucky, more like impoverished, a failure and terrified. In a word, "loser." Fortunately I had sense enough to get help and got my life turned around mostly (99%) by changing the way I think. More specifically, I learned to habitually choose my interpretations of everything more carefully and to look closely for evidence of what I want to experience: love, success, accomplishment….the usual things people seek.
So in this blog post I’m using the word "lucky" but you can choose your own words.
(Note: you can choose more than one, but a maximum of what we’ll call "key words." You can also use words that are not in the word bank.)
Word Bank: fortunate, attractive, wealthy, generous, sexy, bodacious, celebrity, amazing, awesome, hot, healthy, calm, helpful, accomplished, normal, successful, elegant, light, relaxed, alluring, dynamic, saintly, prosperous, fun, popular, rich, peaceful, fantastic, smart flexible.
The thing is, you believe deep inside of you that you will feel lucky when X happens.
I have seen what you might think of as lucky people – just for one example an accomplished surgeon with a great practice, health, academic and professional prestige, wealth and a lovely family. Talking to him is like conversing with Eeyore, in his mind he’s the most oppressed person ever. So he may be lucky; he does not feel lucky. Which do you prefer?
Or you may feel lucky for 20 minutes when X happens, it won’t last. I heard that Chris Evert felt great for approximately 1 hour after winning Wimbledon. Then she felt like herself again. It’s not the winning Wimbledon, it’s the way you live your life. It’s the day-to-day stuff.
So here’s how to feel lucky, or whatever.
1. Write the words down somewhere where you can see them frequently. Ruben puts things like this as daily reminders on his cell phone but I haven’t figured out how to do that yet.
2. Get clear on what feeling _____________ feels like and looks like. Come up with examples.
3. Search like your life depends on it for evidence of luck in your life. Or whatever that adjective or those adjectives are. Be creative and be thorough.
Examples of luck in your life: you’re reading a blog, you have free time, you have a computer, you know how to read, you choose to read, you have a useful tool in your head called a "brain."
Take ANY adjective and go through your life as it is currently constructed and FIND THE EVIDENCE!
Another example. I like to feel wealthy and every time I find a penny, I say to myself, "look just another symbol of my growing wealth. Way to go, Mixon-Camacho!"
4. Make it a daily habit to look for the luck. Every tiny bit helps.
5. As you make it a habit to look for the luck, life will manifest all kinds of opportunities to experience luck. That’s what I learned from my mentor, Christine Kane. Make up your mind first, look for the evidence and watch life bring you one opportunity after another!
You can’t experience miracles if you don’t believe in miracles. You can’t be lucky if you don’t think you’re capable of being lucky. And yes, sometimes luck comes disguised as hard work but most people who work really hard don’t feel lucky.
It’s not the big wins anyway that make a life of excellence, it’s day to day. We are the lucky ones, my friend!